Last year around this time Marco was DMing me that he met my boss and my boss was DMing me that he met my friends from Tumblr and i was dying of jealousy and Melissa, who I hardly knew, was gchatting me saying don’t worry you’ll go next year and i was like, Why would i?
I excuse myself from the table I’m sitting at with Ana and Halcyon so that I can talk to a few more people and I spot Meg in line for the bathroom, so we chat and it’s really good to talk to her and see her since we used to talk like 24 hours a day and then we decided to not “See” each other anymore which I guess means we don’t talk anymore, but that really sucks so I was, like I said, really happy to see her. And we’re making talkytalk when someone vacates the bathroom and Meg says “Hey, wanna just come with me?” and because I’m drinking my second pint glass of gin (kick in the tongue) I say “Sure,” and then I’m sitting on a stool while Meg pees and my thought process was something like this:
“Oh god, why am I in here while Meg is peeing? This is so horribly traumetizing. Oh god, oh god this is terrible. … … Hey, wait. This isn’t at all as bad as I ever thought it would be. Why am I so fucking neurotic? I mean, this is just fine. I’m fine with this. She can pee, I can pee, we’re adults, it’s fine. Oh! But now I’m traumetized by not being traumetized and oh!”
And so, she flushed, and then I peed, and I say something like “Hey, so now that you’ve seen me pee, wanna have sex?” which goes down in my book as the number one thing I regret having said. I mean, if we had not had a thing, it would have been funny and may have actually worked, but we had a thing, you know, and it was just in bad taste and didn’t come out funny at all. So. Oops.
