June 2009
“i was going to write about a man who liked his wife, but was in love with...”
– katie west.
Magnetic Fields — No One Will Ever Love You
...
May 2009
Mariah Carey - Dream Lover (via abcdefghiloveyou)
...
“Everything is rooting for your happiness.”
– (via ingoodtaste)
I finally went with Lindsay to her Saturday morning yoga place. She has been telling me it will change my life for about 6 months now, so I finally threw on some obscene gray leggings and obliged.
Now, this is yoga in Williamsburg. Suffice it to say there was no gold lame left to...
2 tags
Gabriel Kahane— Villanelles
You’ve...
me: Well I can only assume that when we ended it all memory of such was erased from your mind.
him: like Eternal Sunshine?
me: Yes. Eternal Sunshine of the Spotless Vagina.
1 tag
b's bikes.
I decided to walk to the deli tonight and buy a Diet Dr. Pepper because they are free at work and I suddenly find myself dabbling in the stuff again. When I was a nanny I used to drink two of those $1.25 Diet Cokes a day and Bobby used to yell OHMYGOD YOU’RE ADDICTED.
Addiction was a word we threw around a lot in that house, pretty casually. It was how we talked about the little things we...
“RT @MyJewishMother People in glass houses shouldn’t throw gefilte fish.”
– langer.
What would you characterize as an ideal interaction with a reader? Sitting on the subway and watching a stranger laugh at or enjoy something I wrote, having no idea that I’m sitting across from them.
I read her book last week and was constantly paranoid about her doing just that, and then I read this interview, and my fear was justified.
But I imagine that would be pretty groovy.
2 tags
1 tag
I just literally literally LIT.ER.AL.LY walked an...
THIS ISN’T A JOKE. THIS IS NOT.A.JOKE.
And yes everyone who knows me right now is like, Well, at least you were wearing underwear.
To which I say I KNOW BUT THEN MY DRESS WOULDN’T HAVE BEEN TUCKED INTO IT.
True-Friend-O-Meter
exceptforthisone:
Our senior year of college, my friend Meg, changed her birthday on Facebook from the correct date of July 13th to an incorrect date some random day in March.
She then waited to see who would write on her wall or send her a message wishing her a Happy Birthday on the wrong date. Anyone who did was instantly unfriended.
The thing about convincing your friends to sign up on...
1 tag
and that is how you change a day.
Fact: I accidentally turned VoiceOver on on my computer. 6 months ago. It has been a heavy burden.
If you don’t know what VoiceOver is, it’s for blind people (literally…not like OH GOD IT’S FOR BLIND, RETARDED PEOPLE [not like all blind people are retarded. I’m sure there are exceptions!), a little robot reads everything on your screen for you, even narrating when...
as long as he signs up for tumblr.
leo: I heard that it's mostly girls going to the Prom
me: Yea, figures. It's okay, it's not like I was expecting to pick up dudes at an 826 benefit [ed. note: LIE].
leo: I dunno. I think one of you guys is in for a... VAMPIRE weekend.
you guys should not talk that way about Mr. A-Z
me: You can borrow my headphones!
Josh: Aw...but don't you wanna listen to Jason Mraz?
me: FUCK YOU!
Peter: When he uses those headphones, does he have to listen to Jason Mraz or do they work for other music, too?
Josh: Should I run these under water before I put them on?
“Which Will” - Beck originally by Nick Drake (via...
girl talk
halle: i bet her gay is like the boring version of our gays.
me: i bet she doesn't even HAVE a gay.
ps: lol. →
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Apologies to Marshall McLuhan
Instead of fostering actual connection, blogs inevitably activate our baser human instincts—narcissism, vanity, schadenfreude. They offer the petty, cheap thrill of perceived superiority or released vitriol. How easy it is to tap tap tap your indignation and post, post, post into the universe, where it will velcro to the indignation of others, all fusing into a smug, sticky mess and not much...
“He’s not sucking someone’s dick to get on the radio, he’s...”
– While it’s never fun to hear an old man referencing dick-sucking, Bob Lefsetz knows whats up.
And I always love a man who knows how to use his capslock.
(thx to my Internet Big Brother, Will, for the inFO)
Devendra Banhart, Shabop Shalom (via reconnoitre,...
“Our lovemaking was passionate, skillful, kindly, and deeply satisfying. We...”
– Russell Banks, Sarah Cole: A Type of Love Story
This is dedicated to every man I’ve ever been with.
lol, jk. Some of you were terrible.
Hah. This just showed up in my phone:
Fr: Guy in Ugly Velvet Coat
Hi! This is Justin, remember me? The guy in the ugly velvet coat.
WHY YES I DO, JUSTIN. That is exactly what I remember.
That and I made fun of you and your hideous coat for a half hour and you liked it so much you asked for my number.
“She had learned not to be afraid of a man the way, in your childhood, you learn...”
– Lorrie Moore, “You’re Ugly, Too”
“Cute Overload wouldn’t exist if everyone was getting laid more. it is a symptom...”
– FUCK YEAH CILANTRO
I would like to take a moment to point out that I have never posted a cute animal on this blog. Make of that what you will.
“She talked more easily than she had the night before, and I listened as eagerly...”
– Russell Banks, Sarah Cole: A Type of Love Story.
noonish:
I am so infinitely jealous of the “We Love You So” blog. It’s too good for the internet.
HA. TOO GOOD FOR THE INTERNET!
Maybe that’s what happens. Eventually someone pulls you into the corner by your shirtsleeve, whispers it into your ear, and you graduate The Internet. Ha. I love it.
Too fucking good for the Internet.
me: ...like a reality tv show, which is what we all want everything to be, anyway.
halle: isn't that the point of tumblr?
halle: also, to help nerds have sex.
halle: that should be the tumblr motto.
me: Tumblr: Helping Nerds Have Sex Since 2007.
Mariah Carey feat. Jadakiss & Styles P, We...
god, i do live in williamsburg.
will: you're a WORKIN GIRL now!
dunkin donuts cashier: Here's your receipt... A working girl, huh? *eyebrow raise*
me: Not that kind, sir, don't get too excited.
dd cashier: Oh, I know.
me: then why did you say A WORKING GIRLLLLLL, OOOOH
dunkin donuts cashier: I just wanted to acknowledge that I appreciated the alternate meaning of that statement.
“Man up and slice a real cake. You don’t need to peel off its clothes and...”
– Jen, on the “least sexy baked good”.
