“I need to send a money order for $269.73”
“Okay.”
“How fast can I send child support—overnight?”
“Yeah. $269.73, overnight?”
“Yeah, damn, I shouldn’t have to pay that.”
“What?”
“I don’t ever see them damn kids, she don’t let me see ‘em.”
“Well, you shoulda act right.”
“Well, I SHOULDN’TA BEEN AN 18 YEAR OLD VIRGIN WHEN I GOT MARRIED. THAT’S WHAT I SHOULDN’TA DONE.”
“Touche.”**
**actually, she just looked at me over at the next window, waiting for my own postal clerk to finish doing her hour-long basic math problem of HOW MANY STAMPS TO GIVE ME. we both widened our eyes and laughed and then i decided not to brutally murder every single person in a 2 mile radius of the Adelphi Post Office.
