Growing up I always planned to lose my virginity to this song. And by planned, told everyone whenever I could, played it whenever I could, explained to my friendS SUCH nuanced sexual references as, Baby let’s cruise / Let’s flow, let’s glide / Ooh let’s open up, & go inside. Get it? She means INSIDE HER VAGINA. IT’S PERFECT!
Fast forward many years and many unfulfilled plans later and I was in New York, or deep in Brooklyn, rather, with a boy, a musician, of course, whom I had met in the line at Max Fish because I had made fun of him for something in front of all of his friends and then kissed him in the corner, by the juke box, because he said he submitted a List to McSweeney’s or something like that. (THIS WAS AT LEAST THREE YEARS AGO, OKAY). So I was still a virgin and he was very attractive in that I am an incredible jackass and have this really obnoxious spiky hair but play the bass and everybody knows the guys that play the bass are great in bed way and who knows what he said to get me, a virgin nanny who planned to lose it with some guy in a loft apartment over a used bookstore while he read Pablo Neruda or something, to get in a cab and go over the bridge and put on my seatbelt because I was so new I still had that urge and then kiss him in his tiny stupid room full of instruments and, I don’t know, Bill Bryson books.
We sat on the corner of his bed kissing and I devised ways to tell him I was totally not going to sleep with him despite all evidence to the contrary and he said, “One sec, we need music.” And I leaned over him at his little laptop in that, You are totally about to touch my boobs way and he clicked on a playlist that was called LATE NITE MIX (nite not night— I feel like that is important) and what song came on?
